Touching In ~ Pause in 2023



Touching In – Family Angst?


Family Angst?

Waiting for the minestrone soup that I kept hearing in my mind to order to go,
but didn’t know why, a woman sitting quietly next to me at the bar finishing a
glass of wine, strikes up a conversation eventually saying, “I am fed up with my
family. I sent them all off in different directions and told them to go wherever
they want, I am going off to be alone. I need peace of mind.”

I realized now that my Inner Wisdom led me to walk into this place because of
this woman.

I spread the Pause Practice Cards open like a deck of cards. “Wow, these are
beautiful” she exclaims. “This is exactly what I am looking for.” John and I share
Pause, its simplicity, and ease of use in daily life.

I saw her whole demeanor change from BEING FED UP to smiling, connecting,
and realizing there is Another Way. Her phone rang. One of her children called
inviting her to meet up with family for dinner. She joyfully shared, “Oh, I am off
to meet my family. Thank you!”


I heard in my mind, “Pick up some minestrone soup for dinner from LeColognne.”
I dismissed the thought.

Inner Inspiration has a plan I know not of so it speaks up again, “Pick up some
minestrone soup.” Im going back and forth in my mind about why pick up soup
when I can eat at home.

I say to John, “I am thinking about picking up some minestrone soup.” John wasn’t
in favor of it. I dismissed the thought again, yet it kept showing up. With some
resistence, I order the soup, and ask John to run into the restaurant while I park
the car. Sitting in the car I hear within, “Go in the restaurant”. Why should I go in
the restaurant? Inner Wisdom repeats: “Go in the restaurant.”


or NOT DO or SAY SOMETHING? Yet we put up obstacles to following:

1.) I don’t have time.
2.) My plans are already set and in motion.
3.) That makes no sense whatsoever.
4.) Second-guessing and doubting our Inner Knowing.
5.) Analyzing the Inner Guidance.
…..the list goes on.

As strange as LISTENING to and FOLLOWING that still,
small voice within about everyday practical stuff may
sound like the Twilight Zone, the value of doing so is





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Touching In – Did You Know?


Pause for Your Helpful Self
A PAUSE Book for Kids and Parents, too!

Have You Heard?
Kids of all ages
love the book:

“Pause for Your
Helpful Self…
Kids Can Pause
and Parents, too!”

Click the video link below to open the book
and explore the Kids Can Pause Practice.

Look inside and find “Happy”!

Here’s how the book has been helpful…

“One of my parents that met with you, Mary, was excited to use the book for her children.
She started using it with her 9-year-old son to help him regulate his emotions in a healthy way.
She has him write down two scenarios a day on how he used the Pause
to help with confrontation at school. It’s working she says!”
Shera Williams
Family Advocate
YWCA Head Start
Lewis & Clark

Order the book, SHARE, and READ it
with your kids, grandkids, friends,
and the parents you know.

Click on the card below to
Open, Save, Share, Print,
and Enlarge.

I Am Willing
to get to know
My Helpful Self
so I can help
and others.

Get the Kids can Pause Book and learn how to
Pause for Your Helpful Self….
at home, at school, and in Life!





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Touching In – My Untold Story Shared


My Healing Journey began with a Pause
~ Shared by Natalie ~

Recently, I wrote a chapter in the book, Perfectly IMperfect,
which is now published! My chapter is titled, “The Best is Yet to Come”.
In my chapter I share how the Pause Practice helped me find true
healing from a traumatic childhood experience.

I’m sharing my chapter with you today….

The Best is Yet to Come

When I was eleven years old, I woke in the night to see the silhouette of a man in the doorway of my bedroom. As he approached my bedside, I noticed he was naked, and my mind became clouded with confusion, uncertainty, and fear. Frozen in place, unable to move, I longed to become invisible, a tiny speck. In an instant, I was trapped, held in place by what felt like a giant boulder. The assault that ensued that night was a complete betrayal of my trust by someone I knew and loved. It left me traumatized, and that trauma remained with me for years.

I’m finally sharing this story from my childhood, which has needed to be told for more than four decades. After avoiding and stuffing those memories down for so long, I’m ready to move forward free of the guilt and shame I’ve carried my whole life. This shame was never mine to carry….

Through Pausing, I began to perceive my past
in a new and Inspired way.

Click on the
Pause for Inspiration card
to see the front and back
of the card and to
Download, Save, Share,
Print, and Enlarge.





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Touching In – Am I Living In the Truth?


Sharing by Mary

As I watched the violent images and listened to the sounds of pain,

I too fell into suffering and felt the stab of darkness
which can so easily consume. So, I am left wondering,
“Am I living in the truth?”
How about you? Are you living in the truth?

This is not denial ~ I have never been one for denial

~ denial does not heal ~
turning our back on darkness is not the solution

~ Turning our face, mind, heart, and body

towards the LIGHT IS


When darkness appears to have taken hold, what is my response?

In my willingness to PAUSE and consider this question,
I received an answer from Inner Wisdom:

“Mary, the LIGHT within you is stronger than the strength of all darkness.
You can call upon the LIGHT at any time. Keep your trust active in the LIGHT
that consumes all darkness rather than lingering in thoughts of darkness
that so easily grab your attention leading you astray
from the PEACE you have encountered and know is true.”

ONE DAY AFTER HEARING THIS I realized all the ways that
I am not living PEACE during the course of a typical day!
Yes, I am writing about it, talking about it, participating in gatherings supposedly about PEACE,
meditating on PEACE, but not truly living what I know is the truth.
Not as much as I want to be anyway!

So, I ask Inner Wisdom two questions that help me live in the truth:

1) “Is there another way to see this?”
2) “What would be truly helpful now?”

I want to practice trusting THIS TOTALITY of PEACE that I have experienced
over and over again and know beyond a shadow of a doubt TO BE REAL.

Living In The Truth Is A Practice

I want to live in the truth.
I pause to step back from clinging to darkness.
I stay vigilant to the ways that I fall prey to darkness thinking this is where my safety lies!

For example:

> Off-the-cuff interactions in relationships
> The tone of my voice or someone else
> Taking things personally
> Watching violent images over and over
> Getting drawn into divisiveness
> Not pausing
> Believing inner and outer dispiriting voices

Thankfully, it’s my choice to live in the
truth that resides in my True Self ~
I can Pause for my True Self
in any communication,
situation, &





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Touching In – Pause Is My Yoga



Mary shares a recent personal experience showing
how Inspiration guides each of us
uniquely and very specifically.

Will we follow?

I heard within from my Inner Knowing, “PAUSE IS YOUR YOGA”. I knew this

was true the moment I received it. In one pause, we can access LOVE
wherever we are, whatever we are doing, and whomever we are with. PEACE
can seem so fleeting and beyond our reach, yet in one simple pause we can
receive assurance from every angle that the LOVE we may not even realize we
are seeking is WITHIN to help EVERYONE with EVERYTHING.

Why? So we can Love and encounter our True Nature.

Inspiration’s guidance dwells within our True Nature and is UNIQUE and
SPECIFIC FOR EACH OF US, clear and truly helpful. If I am simply willing to get
out of my own way and set aside what I think is “understanding”, I am showered
with wondrous experiences that open hearts to truly receiving This LOVE that heals
the isolation that haunts us and shadows every moment, but doesn’t have to.

Here’s My Experience
(nothing against Hatha yoga by the way!)
Have you ever felt as if you were guided to do something only to find out
during or after, that something didn’t feel right? I have signed up for five
Yoga Teacher Trainings! I end up leaving these trainings because the teaching
isn’t what I had hoped, the program is disorganized, or it’s wonderful, but I become physically ill.

So, I decided to PRACTICE Pause For Inspiration (by the way I did not practice
before deciding to sign up for any these trainings), but now that I am in a quandary, I
Pause for my Inner Wisdom and am clearly shown the central problem.

Yes, the central problem is that I chose to ignore, resist, push away, fight with, and
frankly, completely discount the incredibly valuable knowledge and practical direction
provided to me by This Knowing Within.

So, now I decide to use The Pause Practice. I pause, get out of my own way, listen
closely to the specific help shared by my Inner Teacher and I FOLLOW!
A quiet thought enters my receptive mind, “PAUSE IS YOUR YOGA”. I begin
RECEIVING specific inner direction on how to breathe and move my body
one movement at a time. I am MOVING IN THE PAUSE.

You can have your unique experience in following your
True Inner Wisdom!

I am ecstatic BECAUSE I am expressing my True Nature.

When I dismiss my True Nature and look for another answer,
initially I may feel happy, in charge of my life, even on the right path.
Eventually, I feel disconnected
I am barely breathing

WHAT DO YOU EXPERIENCE as you pause, get out of your own way, listen to the truly helpful Wisdom of your Inner Knowing, and follow?

When I pause, listen, and truly FOLLOW my Inner Teacher,

I begin slowly with lots of pausing because the

ego self wants to jump back in.

I call upon Inspiration for help with discerning

my cubicle self my Inspired Self.

As I trust, I follow, and as I follow, my trust in

Inner Wisdom increases.


JOY bubbles up on the inside.



Creating flows and I feel alive.

I laugh.

I move my body with ease in ways that are wise and healthy for me.

I am healing and extending healing.

I have a sense of purpose.

Life is meaningful BECAUSE I am being guided by MEANING ITSELF.

I am the Breath of Inspiration





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Touching In – The Kid In You


For the Kids You Know and the Kid in You!

Sharing by Mary ~ This is our KIDS CAN PAUSE Practice, yet I find it
extremely helpful to use on the days when I am on the verge of a temper
tantrum, that self-critical voice takes hold, or maybe
I feel sad because everyone seems so serious and
I just want to PLAY!

Your Helpful Self is the LOVE and WISDOM in you.

Pause: I choose to let my mind be calm.
I am willing to feel calm.
So, I pause for as long as I need.

Step Back: I choose to slow down and breathe.

I am willing to get out of my own way.

So, I can get help with listening
and learning new things, or when I
am feeling stuck, anxious or upset. I
can step back and My Helpful Self will
step in and help me.

Step Aside: I choose to pause, be
still, and listen to My Helpful Self.

I am willing to let My Helpful Self s
how me thoughts, feelings, words,
and actions that are helpful.

So, I ask My Helpful Self, “What
is Safe, Kind, and Truly Helpful now?”
I pause and listen. My Helpful Self
points me in a helpful direction.

Let My Helpful Self Guide: I
choose to follow My Helpful Self to be

I am willing to get to know
My Helpful Self.

So, I can help myself and
. My Helpful Self encourages
me and is my True Friend.


“Pause For Inspiration”


Pause Practices.


s/h extra.

thank you





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Touching In – Adventure Awaits


Anxiety or Enthusiasm ~ which to choose?

Sharing by Natalie


Anytime I do something new I’m faced with a choice… get carried away
with anxiety or lean into the adventure and enthusiasm?

Whether it’s a trip out of the country, a physical fitness challenge, a new
personal growth habit I want to develop, a speaking class, buying a new
house, adopting a pet, or starting a new job I’m faced with a decision.

Choosing to channel my energy into enthusiasm might not be automatic,
but it is my preference, so I turn to the
Pause Practice, which is always helpful.

I’ll admit, lately I’ve been feeling
a mixture of enthusiasm and anxious
anticipation of what is to come…

~ I’m enthusiastic because I’m
contributing a chapter in an anthology
that will be published on October 5th.


~ I’m experiencing anxious anticipation
because the story I’m telling has not
been shared with many people.
Oh my…

In my chapter, I share about an experience I had as a child that left me feeling
traumatized and I provide the steps I took to heal years later.

My journey toward healing started with a Pause.

After using the Pause Practice, I was finally able to experience my calm quiet mind and begin to hear my true inner wisdom providing love and supportive guidance.

I became open to healing my heart.

I followed the guidance that organically showed up in my Pausing and I began
to experience true peace, clarity, and healing for the first time in my life.

What a joyous freedom ride this has been! Weeee!

I write this as a reminder to myself to choose growth, adventure, and the
enthusiasm this brings over the anxiety trip of worry and stress.

I can ask inner wisdom at any time, “What would be truly helpful right now?”

Then, I can rest and listen for guidance that is always safe, kind, wise, and truly helpful.

Click on the
Pause for Wisdom card
to print, enlarge, download, save, and share.





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Touching In – Certainty of Purpose


Mary Shares

“Trust what is unseen in this moment and you will someday rejoice
in what you see.” Pause Golden Book p. 21

What do you tend to choose? Left to my own devices I tend to choose
doing over resting. When I received Pause For Inspiration in 2009, I knew Pause
was my Inner Knowing teaching me that:

It is not only okay to rest, rest is essential.
It is essential to Pause for Rest.
Resting in the pause can be short, long, quick, or sustained.
Pausing of one’s mind and/or body gives space for creating.

Creating is the practice of trusting what is unseen and unheard and
following its movements even though I don’t know where they may lead.

This moment is an opportunity to wait for the unseen, the unheard, to be revealed. Even while
going about one’s daily life.

How can we trust that which is unseen and unheard?
Why trust such things?
It is my experience that as I am willing to PRACTICE PAUSING for Inspiration, Inner
Wisdom, and Peace of Mind, I build trust in these because they prove to be
invaluable and even practical. Everyday life is more meaningful.
Peace of mind becomes my purpose.

Certainty is what I find in The Pause.

In a pause, I may hear words of Wisdom that I know I can trust. Wisdom enters through
my thoughts and in my own voice. It is not separate from who I am; not “other”. I see in
my mind how to proceed, how to go about a task, or what direction to move in, or not. I
may not want to accept my Inner Wisdom initially because it is often such a
turnaround from my habitual way of perceiving, but even so, I trust the Wisdom
because the
sound of it rings true.

The SOUND of Certainty is distinct.
Whereas the ego is trying to sound wise, if I step back and listen
closely, it won’t be long before I notice I am being pulled into
ways of perceiving, thinking, talking, and doing that are unwise.
The cubicle heart÷mind is quite the trickster.

In a pause, one can hear sounds never heard before.
In graduate school studying for a Neuroscience exam, I decided to pause for
rest. I began hearing the sound of a complete symphony being created in my
mind moment by moment.
I was hearing fantastic sounds I never heard before.
I felt I was hearing the sound of creation creating.

Today I was telling myself that I had NO INSPIRATION to write and share with you.
I decided to practice what I share and so I practiced Pause For LOVE.
Look what showed up!

What’s the point?

When one is willing to Pause For Love, one may see the unseen
and hear the unheard and learn to trust that what is being shared
truly productive versus busyness as a disguise for meaning.

What is the Pause For LOVE Practice?


While I was practicing Pause For LOVE,
I heard the words of Inner Present LOVE in my mind,

“There’s never been a time that I didn’t love you.”





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Touching In – Families Pausing Creating Harmony


Families Pausing Creating Harmony

Something Spectacular Happened

In an instant, my entire perspective on life shifted as I saw how little and unimportant my own ego concerns are.
One annoying personal illusion after another was lifted and didn’t matter anymore.

Absolute Harmony did!

Sharing by Mary

. . . that is what happened as The Pause Crew mingled, conversed, smiled, laughed, hugged, listened, and shared PAUSE with

INCREDIBLY RECEPTIVE parents, teachers, young adults, teens, and children
participating in the Better Family Life Back-to-School event.


atmosphere of PURE LOVE.

. . . so much more than giving away free materials.


“What is Pause?”

“What is it for?”

“Can it help my stress?”

“Can it help my child?”

“So how does it work?”


“I am a teacher and can share this with my students.”

“Oh, I love Pause. I ran out of cards so I need more.”

“This is exactly what I am looking for as my son has ADHD and they just put him on medicine and there has to be a better solution.”

“I was in your Pause class at St. Louis Job Corps! I lost my Pause book and need another! I love it!”


This woman brought several teen girls to our booth to share PAUSE with them because of how it has helped her for years.

Families Are Flowing With PAUSE


~ 240 Pause Golden Books
~ 425 Kids Can Pause and Parents Too! Books
~ 14,000 Pause Practice Cards

. . . and even more than all that, This LOVE THAT TRULY LOVES NO MATTER WHAT, was given and received

Thank you Pause Crew ~

Lisa, Natalie, and John for who you are, all the ways you serve, and your willingness to Practice The Pause as the best way of sharing it with others!

Huge thanks to Myron who truly was in one continual
pause the whole day keeping the table stocked
and the flow flowing . . .





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Touching In – What I LOVE Most About PAUSE – One-to-One


Sharing by Mary

1 : 1

What I LOVE most about PAUSE is ONE of the central messages of Pause ~

Willingness to practice being present ONE-to-ONE, face-to-face, in person in
the midst of living our everyday ordinary lives.

Opening to experiencing the Extraordinary in the ordinary.

Passersby, fleeting encounters, and those with whom we linger can be spaces to
recognize our connectedness. We can pause from our screens and become aware
of the fellow travelers with whom we are sharing this earth.

We can CONNECT with the earth too!

Pausing 1:1 helps me to RECOGNIZE our CONNECTEDNESS that really matters while
engaging in daily routines that don’t seem to matter much.

IN AN INSTANT one can experience:
>Who I am truly vs. who I think I should be
> Why I am here vs. “What am I doing on this earth?”
> The life-changing power of BEING PRESENT WITH PRESENCE
> A sense of purpose right here, right now vs.
waiting for one’s purpose to show up in the future
when this happens or that happens . . .

Robotic habitual thoughts and motions managing the status quo woe
TENSE the mind and body hindering us from being present with one another.

I cannot be present with you if I am too tense to be present with myself!


Pause One-to-One

Step Back from what I think I see

Step Aside asking my True Self “Show me how to see.”

Follow my True Self into the Extraordinary

wherever I am

whatever I am doing

whomever I am with.

I was moved to give a Pause For LOVE practice card to the young man
cashiering. Looking over the card he raised his eyes and responded,

“Thanks for noticing me.” We saw one another.

IMAGINE seemingly meaningless moments that we are often trying to get through
and be done with becoming opportunities to heal the sense of disconnectedness
we sometimes experience in an ordinary day.

Your Inner Peace Will Guide You 1:1

Pause doesn’t tell people what to think, believe, say, or do or how to walk, talk, dress, or shake hands. Your True Self will direct you in how to connect in Truly Helpful ways.







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